Late night babbling of a lovestruck wife

"He loves you a lot, you know. I can tell because I see the notes he leaves you, I see the way he does anything and everything you want, just so you could have an easy day".

This past Saturday, as my Dad and I sat under a big shaded tree watching Kai's baseball game, we have a conversation about my marriage.



You've read our story a hundred times. Newly turned 21 year old boy meets 26 year old Mom of 2. The odds were against us. Yet, it's turned out to be something so intense, so passionate, so loving, caring, trusting. So RIGHT.

I spend my weekdays yearning for him while he's at work, sending him 'I miss you' or 'I want to fuck you' texts. I hear his truck pull up and sneak a look out the blinds, beyond excited to just get a glimpse of him. He always comes into the house, grins, and greets me with a "Hey". Usually, I shoot a smile back and hug him. Sometimes, my restraint goes out the window and I'm grabbing him all lustful like I'm a teenage boy.

He gets to me like no one else does. My worries don't last long when I'm with him. I take pride in being a strong, opinionated person. With him, I don't mind being taken care of, or depending on him emotionally. He has enough strength for us both, and I trust him with all my heart, in every way possible.

I'll be the first one to admit that I'm impossible. I'm an overachiever, a neat freak. My expectations are high. I strive for perfection. I am possessive and have a bad temper. He is the exact opposite of me. He has a way of regarding me with such love and understanding that my worries and anger simply evaporate. He is my kryptonite.

He became a Stepdad at the age of 23. He had an important place in Kai & Jewel's life even before that. He has made the same parenting decisions that I would make. He is loving, fair, firm, and fun. We share values and dreams. I've never felt like him & the kids were two separate parts of my family. The way he interacts with the kids is the biggest part of why I love him.

I never pictured myself with someone like him. Raised on a farm, up early to feed the animals, and home late after baseball, basketball or football practice. Dirty blond and blue eyed. Works on cars, rides dirt bikes, races cars, plays ball, and can fix ANYTHING. I love my hardworking dirty boy. His grit is so sexy to me. He attempts to clean up and get dressed up on the occasion that dressing up is needed, but I'd much rather see him in jeans and a t.

We do things we both enjoy. This past weekend, I raced in the same division as him, on a dirt track. It was intimidating as hell, with him speeding past me because of course he was in the lead (AND won both of our races that night), but that huge interest that we have in common has definitely fueled our passion. We love being outdoors camping, riding our ATVs, watching races, and sitting back watching the kids, in amazement that they belong to US.

He brushes my arm with his fingers and that effortless gesture from him feels like electricity running through me. Not to mention the sex is still fucking amazing.

So how in the fuck does someone like him love ME? I mean, he must, right? he wouldn't have stuck around this long if he didn't. I know he doesn't appeal to everyone, but he fits my soul, my heart. A love story not out of the ordinary, but feeling like a fairy tale. I daydream about us. I make plans for us, as a family.

I don't want to ever not be with him. I want us to always be this way, the way we are now. I love him so much that I refuse to think about any part of us changing for any reason. It's too painful for me to think about.

I will love him for my lifetime, but mine nor his lifetime is not a guarantee. So tomorrow, I'll kiss him goodbye in the morning, miss him all day, and melt into his arms when he gets home. Because I love him, and, somehow, he loves me.


You and I, forever ever.